Have you recently gone through a breakup? If so, it’s completely normal to be tempted to contact your ex in order to get something off your chest, apologize, or request another chance. Nevertheless, one is supposed to follow certain rules when texting your ex-partner to prevent even greater disappointment. There are certain boundaries you should respect, such as avoiding contact if your ex has already moved on with another person.
Impulsive texts aren’t recommended in order to prevent confusion. Hence, being candid and realistic is indispensable when engaging in communication with your past love. In case you hesitate what to text after the no contact rule, make sure to avoid bad text messages and spam texting.
The information below will help you understand when it’s a good idea to text your ex-partner.
Table of Contents
Don’t text him/her impulsively
One of the worst mistakes individuals do following a breakup is texting their ex-partners impulsively, without any special intention on their mind. Each person is supposed to question his/her true intentions prior to reaching out to the ex-boyfriend/ex-girlfriend. Make sure you determine the exact purpose of contacting your old flame, as well as consider the potential conversation flow.
In addition, always consider the effect your messages will have on both yourself and your ex. Are you the only one to benefit from the conversation? Also, be considerate to the feelings of your ex-partner, especially if you were the one ending the relationship. Never text your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend if your messages will only add insult to injury.
Cutting off all contact with your past love isn’t necessarily required for a person to move on. For instance, texting your ex on special occasions isn’t the worst idea if you ended your relationship on a friendly note. Nevertheless, sending friendly texts to the other person who hasn’t moved on yet is undoubtedly compassionless.
Be candid
Being straightforward is one of the golden rules when reaching out to your ex-partner for the first time following the breakup. Make sure the text message clearly states the reason why you’ve decided to get in touch with him/her in order to prevent suspiciousness. Keep in mind that the other person will immediately question the intent of the message, perhaps even get his/her hopes up about getting back together.
Therefore, when texting your ex-partner, try being as candid as possible. If your ultimate goal is getting back together, invite your ex-boyfriend/ex-girlfriend for a coffee in order to explain your feelings face-to-face. If your past love agrees to see you, use the coffee meeting wisely to explain your reasons why you believe your relationship deserves another shot. Go to this site to check out five legit reasons for getting back together with your ex.
In contrast, if your intention is cutting off all contact, make sure you notify your ex about this decision. You can explain your intent over the phone or in-person, depending on whether you’d like to meet your ex-partner one last time. There’s nothing better than being frank with your ex while texting, even if your ultimate goal is closure.
Be realistic about your expectations
When texting your ex-partner, it’s paramount to be realistic about the potential response you’ll receive. Getting your hopes up isn’t the wisest decision, especially if your separation was chaotic. Contacting an ex for the purpose of getting closure isn’t exactly recommended to individuals who’ve recently gone through a catastrophic breakup. In such scenarios, your ex-lover will probably be too aggravated or hurt to care about your feelings.
Avoid any contact if the breakup has left both parties deeply hurt. Conversely, reaching out to your ex while knowing you won’t be hurt is the only time when you should be looking for answers. Being absolutely realistic will save you from disappointment and getting even more heartbroken.
Respect his/her existing relationship status
Ex-partners are supposed to be respectful of the existing relationship status of the other person. Consequently, texting an ex is considered inappropriate when one of the partners has recently started a new relationship. The involvement of other people complicated things, which is why you need to be considerate of the feelings of his/her current partner. The following link, https://www.sweetyhigh.com/read/stop-obsessing-over-exs-new-relationship-tips-010918 includes some useful tips for not obsessing over your ex’s new relationship.
Staying friends with your ex-partner isn’t unattainable even if he/she has found a new love. Nevertheless, make sure you refrain from texting at the beginning of his/her relationship with another person in order to avoid causing problems. Keep in mind that trust is hard to establish when involved with someone new. The other person wouldn’t be thrilled to learn his/her partner is still texting you.
Meet him/her in person when necessary
Meeting your ex-partner in person is sometimes considered better than texting him/her, depending on the type of conversation you intend to have. For instance, when interested in giving your relationship another shot, a face-to-face meeting would be the best decision. Explaining your reasons for getting back together is best done in person, not over the phone, let alone a text. The same goes for discussing the reasons for breaking up. This topic might take hours to discuss, which makes it inappropriate for a phone conversation.
On the other hand, some topics require a simple text exchange, such as making peace or apologizing for your actions. Make sure to avoid face-to-face meetings if seeing your past love would confuse you even more and make it tough for you to move on.
Back off when receiving no response
It’s of the utmost importance for individuals to back off at the right time. After receiving no response from your ex to your texts and calls, it’s high time to move on. Silence speaks louder than words. It tells you everything about his/her intentions of staying in contact with you. Instead of being persistent, back off and respect his/her decision.
Final word
Choose the right timing and words when texting your ex-partner.
Don’t act impulsively and have regrets later!
